drafting "I'm Sick of Being Lied To"

diff --git a/content/drafts/im-sick-of-being-lied-to.md b/content/drafts/im-sick-of-being-lied-to.md
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--- a/content/drafts/im-sick-of-being-lied-to.md
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@@ -20,13 +20,44 @@ Status: draft
 >
 > —_Distress_ by Greg Egan
 
-I just can't, can't, _can't_ get over the extent to which my observations of discussions of trans issues seem to be best explained by the hypothesis that _everyone is lying_.
+I just can't, can't, _can't_ get over the extent to which my observations while trying to talk to people about autogynephilia seem to be best explained by the hypothesis that _everyone is lying_.
 
-I know, that's not psychologically plausible. Which only makes it _worse_. The sheer depths of denial, mendacity, and cowardice from _incredibly_ smart and moral people whom I love and otherwise respect is just _staggering_; I _would not believe it_ if I didn't see it with my own eyes.
+I know, that's not psychologically plausible. Which only makes it _worse_. The sheer _depths_ of denial, mendacity, and cowardice from incredibly smart people whom I love and otherwise respect—or _used_ to respect—is just _staggering_; I _would not believe it_ if I didn't see it with my own eyes.
 
-People _agree_ 
+People seem to _agree_ that erotic female embodiment fantasies are _very common_ in (non-androphilic, not already behaviorally feminine) males who later choose to transition into being trans women. Some people claim that this is a mere side-effect of, or coping mechanism for dealing with gender dysphoria, the 
 
 
-People will say, "You're wrong, _and_ it doesn't matter." Or, "You might be right, but it doesn't matter—we already know what the appropriate intervention is: transition." Or, "This makes sense to me, but don't tell anyone I said so." Or, "I disagree, and want to privately discuss the science with you, but if you successfully change my mind, I don't want anyone to know." Or, "Don't tell " 
+In an honest disagreement, people say, "You're wrong, and it matters, and we should try resolve this in public using evidence and reasoning, so that others who are interested in the matter can learn and make up their own minds."
 
-The people you're afraid of 
+
+For the most part, that's not what I see. Instead, people say, "You're wrong, _and_ it doesn't matter, _and_ you shouldn't be talking about this." Or, "You might be right, but it doesn't matter." Or, "This makes sense to me, but don't tell anyone I said so." Or, "I disagree, and want to privately discuss the science with you, but if you successfully change my mind, I don't want anyone to know." Or, "
+
+One trans woman told me (paraphrased),  [Could someone transition b/c of a fetish? Maybe, but must be very rare]
+
+Another said (paraphrased), [don't talk about AGP, but favorably cites Anne Vitale]
+
+
+What the _fuck_ is wrong with you people?
+
+Yes, this is politically inconvenient.
+
+What is your endgame, anyway?
+
+What's in it for me?
+
+Everyone is lying about the key diagnostic criterion, so people don't _know_ that they're trans, and then people get married
+
+
+bastion of sanity should zero in on the right answer
+
+but I can't, because I know too much
+
+yes, there are gatekeeping incentives, but you could at least _try_ to be truthful within the constraints—is that what Vitale is doing?
+
+
+I get people telling me, 
+
+
+No, I am _not_ a trans woman and have _absolutely no interest_ in being a trans woman. Not given currently existing technology, and _especially_ not 
+
+I am nothing more and nothing less than a man (adult male human) who wants to know what it feels like to be a woman (adult female human) because of my paraphilic sexual/romantic orientation.