From: M. Taylor Saotome-Westlake Date: Sat, 3 Jun 2023 00:37:21 +0000 (-0700) Subject: memoir: "Roberta" crisis email series X-Git-Url: http://534655.efjtl6rk.asia/source?a=commitdiff_plain;h=eeccc292a635b9cefc358633f89177a5790749a5;p=Ultimately_Untrue_Thought.git memoir: "Roberta" crisis email series --- diff --git a/content/drafts/people-evolved-social-control-mechanisms-and-rocks.md b/content/drafts/people-evolved-social-control-mechanisms-and-rocks.md index 72ab37d..bd98451 100644 --- a/content/drafts/people-evolved-social-control-mechanisms-and-rocks.md +++ b/content/drafts/people-evolved-social-control-mechanisms-and-rocks.md @@ -726,30 +726,63 @@ She said she'd want to have a more detailed conversation about it before offerin ------ +At 5:08 _p.m._ on 2 April 2017, Michael wrote to me that someone else was in psych prison, and could use help along lines that matched my focus and experience (Subject: "Another autogynophilic [_sic_] rationalist is in a psych ward"). + +"Thanks for telling me", I said, "What can I do to help?" + +He asked if I knew anyone in Pittsburgh (perhaps, effective altruists at Carnegie Mellon) who would be willing to help, if I could visit a hospital there if needed, and— + +> Do you feel that you can provide the sort of attentive, active listening that would emotionally support someone in a high integrity agitated state where their ideas may not be literally true, and also may be true but hard to justify, but the ideas are at least honest metaphorical pointers at something that they think is there and needs to be recognized for safety? + +I made a Facebook post asking if I knew anyone in Pittsburgh available for a "Azkaban[^azkaban] (psych ward) rescue mission", and waited for more information. + +[^azkaban]: A reference to the magical prison in Yudkowsky's [_Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality_](https://www.hpmor.com/), where inmates are subjected to psychic torture. + + (It seems right for the attribution here to go to Yudkowsky rather than J. K. Rowling, because while Rowling invented Azkaban, it was Yudkowsky's depiction that established it in our subculture as a metonym for a _bad place that shouldn't exist_, which is how I was using the allusion.) + +More information came in an email that night from Lex Gendel[^lex-name] to me, Michael, and a few other people. The person in distress was a trans woman of my acquaintance whom I'll call "Roberta". Apparently, "Roberta" had had a psychotic episode. Her parents bought her a plane ticket back to Europe, but when she attempted to board the plane, she was committed to an unknown psych ward in Pittsburgh. As far as Lex knew, "Roberta" was currently too psychotic to play nice with the authorities. Our contact point with the family was her brother, who wasn't that cooperative and was also in Europe. (I'm imagining he was the source of this information—that the authorities at least called the family?) + +[^lex-name]: The "From" header was still using Lex's deadname (he's transmasculine), but when I asked on 4 April 2017 which name was preferred, he said that he strongly preferred Alexander or variants thereof except where that would out him to his family. + +Our mission was to find out where "Roberta" was and how to contact her. "Stacy" (also on the email) was local to Pittsburgh. "Kyle" and I started looking up Pittsburgh-area psych wards on Google Maps and calling them. + +"Kyle" made much more progress than me at calling hospitals. (Maybe he had a smarter Maps query, but maybe he was just less inhibited than me and could get more things done per minute.) I added "Roberta"'s email address to the thread so that she could look at it later and judge our competence as friends. + +Sewickley Hospital, the closest to the airport, told "Kyle" that "Roberta" was not there, but that they wouldn't be able to tell him if she were, which wasn't information-theoretically smart of them—if you actually care about not leaking information, you're supposed to [refuse to confirm or deny](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glomar_response), not agree to deny but refuse to confirm—but fortunate for us, insofar as it clued us in to what was probably going on when Western Psychiatric Institute and Clinic of UPMC said that they couldn't confirm whether "Roberta" was there. + +UPMC Presbyterian _did_ have a record of "Roberta" that they were willing to tell "Kyle" about: she was discharged—and probably taken to the aforementioned Western Psychiatric Institute. + +Western Psych continued to refuse to confirm—although they did take down my number (and "Kyle"'s, and Lex's) for "Roberta" to call _if_ she was there and wanted to. + +I kept calling, at intervals. I tried bluffing ("No, I _know_ she's there", I told Madeline at Western Psych). I tried prompting for advice ("I realize that you're just doing your job and that you can't help me, but as a person, can you tell me who I should send next?—a lawyer, or a psychiatrist?" I told Cathy). I tried asking for a manager. (The manager, Laura, had just left.) Cathy volunteered to forward me to Patient's Rights. (It went to voicemail.) + +I asked Scott Alexander (whom I had tagged into the thread earlier) if _he_ could call, following up on the "sending a psychiatrist" guess (Subject: "a plea to our inside man (was: Re: information centralizing thread for [roberta] situation)"). + +Finally, on the evening of 3 April, inspiration struck: I asked Debbie when visiting hours were. Then I asked "Stacy" to just visit physically. ("Let me know if there's any way I can sweeten the deal for you if this is at all inconvenient. (Eternal gratitude? Cash bounty to be negotiated? Any programming work you need done?)" I added.) The theory here was that the psych prison employees had been programmed not to be helpful over the phone for fear that HIPAA demons would eat them, but that they're not afraid of a physical person on-site, especially a nonthreatening nonmale person (Subject: "a plea to our on-site woman (was: Re: a plea to our inside man)"). + +I was not reassured by the staff's claims that "Roberta" could call us back if she was there. I believed that they wrote down the number. (Someone read it back to me on my second call.) I was not confident in "Roberta" actually getting the number and the opportunity to make a phone call. + +I wrote to the thread: + +> In this situation, I don't think we should be modeling ourselves as people having meaningful conversations with other people over the phone. We are _extracting our friend from the bowels of an unaligned AI_. The reason we're using words rather than force isn't because force would be wrong; it's because we'd lose. Don't be fooled by the fact that the AI happens to use humans as components. + +Scott got back to me. His being a psychiatrist wasn't going to make any difference. All we could do was leave a message; if "Roberta" didn't call back, then either she wasn't there or didn't want us meddling. + +I harshly took exception to that disjunction. What if the bastards never gave her the message? What if she was too impaired from the psychotic break and the kidnapping to place a call herself, but would _really appreciate_ being handed a phone with someone she knows on the line? + +(There had been a moment during my psych imprisonment the other month, when I had noticeable diffculty dialing a phone. I was still a _person_, even when not all of my usual cognitive abilities were online.) + +I offered to bet him $500 at 20:1 odds: + +(Subject: "in which gratitude and skepticism is expressed; and, a profit opportunity (was: Re: a plea to our on-site woman)") + [TODO: "Roberta" situation - * Michael writes to me, not sure that I wanted to be notified, but that someone needs help along lines that match my focus and experience (Subject: Another autogynophilic rationalist is in a psych ward) - * Asks if we know anyone in Pittsburgh, any CMU EAs there to help, if needed could I visit - * Asks if I could provide the "attentive, active listening that would emotionally support someone in a high integrity agitated state where their ideas may not be literally true, and also may be true but hard to justify, but the ideas are at least honest metaphorical pointers at something that they think is there and needs to be recognized for safety" - * I post to Facebook: "Do I know (or know anyone who knows) any EA/rationalist folk in the vicinity of Pittsburgh, PA available to help with an Azkaban (psych ward) rescue mission? Not a joke." - * Lex (whose email From field still used deadname) starts information centralizing thread, got commited while trying to board a plane - * based on Google Maps, we started calling hosptials in the area - * we found reason to believe she was at Western Psychiatric Institute and Clinic of UPMC, in contrast to getting explicit denials from Sewickley Hospital (closest to airport but not there. Said he would not be able to tell me she was there if she was, but can tell me she is *not* there.), Forbes Regional, and Mercy Behavioral - * "UPMC presbyterian has a record of a devi borg. she was discharged. he said she was probably taken to western psych and recommended calling them" - * I called, still getting stonewalling - * "adding Devi's address to the thread so that she can look at it later and decide whether we deserve to be condemned for not being competent enough to rescue her faster" - * The next day, I call in the morning, and in the afternoon, Cathy keeps Glomar'ing me; I ask to speak to manager; manager Laura just left; I leave a voicemail message to patient's rights; I ask Scott if he can claim to be Devi's Magical Authority Figure (offer to bribe him) (Subject: "a plea to our inside man") - * I call again and get visiting hours and ask Chana to visit (offer to bribe her) (Subject: "a plea to our on-site woman (was: Re: a plea to our inside man)") - * I believe that they wrote a number down, but I don't believe that Devi actually got the opportunity to call; we're extracting our friends from the bowels on an unaligned AI - * Michael backchannels to me: "Exactly the right characterization Zack. I would tone it down right now but write these things down and we can discuss them after the fact." - * Scott: no point in me calling, agree with what you're doing - * I get angry at Scott for the "no meddle" suggestiong (Subject: "Re: in which gratitude and skepticism is expressed; and, a profit opportunity (was: Re: a plea to our on-site woman)") * Steven on increasingly black-arts methods * Lex: systems are corrupt, when even Scott writes about lacking the agency to not commit people who should not be committed * Scott: accepts the bet, it's illegal to keep patients incommunicado * I'm treating this as a kidnapping (Subject: "Hijack Innocent People And Abscond") * I talk to Karen Robinson, the manager of patient relations, who is a Christian * Lex says one of us might have to fly to Pittsburg; might think some of us are agents - * I ask for clarification, and clarification about name (I took off the trailing 'a' in the To: header) * I concede the bet based on Chana's testimony * Scott offers to nullify; I insist ]